| Women need to start taking more risks if | | | | already partly behind the eight ball, in |
| they want to make more money! And if | | | | comparison to men. Women simply haven't |
| women are going to take more risks, they | | | | had enough practice, to tolerate the |
| need to be able to tolerate the anxiety | | | | anxiety that risk taking entails. And it |
| that can come with risk taking, for that | | | | is in mastering this anxiety that the |
| is why risk taking is so difficult. We | | | | answer lies.How do you do this? By |
| need to risk picking up the phone and | | | | flexing your risk taking muscles. |
| calling a potential referral source. We | | | | Actively look for situations and places |
| need to risk speaking up more at | | | | where you can take a risk. Obviously, |
| networking meetings. We need to risk | | | | start small. Some of you need to start |
| offering a new service or creating a new | | | | by negotiating with your waiter about |
| niche. We need to risk raising our | | | | the irregularities of your order. Some |
| fees.So if we have so much to gain by | | | | of you are ready to offer yourself as a |
| risk taking, why is it so difficult? | | | | potential speaker. But push yourself, |
| Because on top of having to deal with | | | | wherever you are, until you feel |
| anxiety, the other reality is that you | | | | uncomfortable. (Remember, if you are not |
| won't always win. You won't always get | | | | pushing on your comfort zone, it |
| what you ask for. Therefore, being able | | | | actually shrinks!) Now it's true that by |
| to risk really means being able to deal | | | | not risking, you are able to avoid |
| with hearing a possible "no" or "not | | | | feeling uncomfortable. But the more you |
| right now", and a lot of women tend to | | | | flee from an anxiety provoking |
| interpret this as rejection. Rejection | | | | situation, the more you build up your |
| always feels more personal than simple | | | | aversion to taking risks and feeling |
| defeat.Boys learn to deal with risk | | | | anxiety. It will become more and more |
| taking anxiety at a very young age, | | | | difficult.Remember, you can practice |
| hurtling their little bodies off of play | | | | risk taking in your own mind. Imagine |
| structures and later on the sports | | | | yourself taking the risk and see |
| field. Girls are actively engaged in | | | | yourself as being calm and okay, no |
| their social interconnections while boys | | | | matter what. See it again and again. The |
| are playing a variety of "games", sports | | | | more you think about risk taking, and |
| related and otherwise. Game playing, | | | | imagine yourself able to do it, the |
| which boys tend to engage in far more | | | | easier it will be to actually risk |
| than girls, teaches important skills. | | | | something. Actively ask yourself, where |
| Boys learn that sometimes you win and | | | | can I take a risk?The bottom line is |
| sometimes you lose. If boys interpreted | | | | that it will be difficult to make great |
| all "losses" as "rejections", their game | | | | money if you do not take risks. So learn |
| playing careers would be short-lived! | | | | to tolerate risk taking by flexing your |
| And in the dating arena, it is still far | | | | risk muscle often. More money awaits |
| more common for men to do the asking, | | | | you!Mikelann Valterra, MA is the founder |
| (do the risking) and consequently they | | | | of the Women's Earning Institute and the |
| must deal with the anxiety of "getting | | | | author of Why Women Earn Less- How to |
| shot down".Indeed, there is some | | | | Make What You're Really Worth. As a |
| evidence that risk taking is at least | | | | specialist in women's earning issues, |
| partially gender specific. (For a great | | | | her mission is to empower women to earn |
| discussion of this, see Linda Austin's | | | | what they're really worth. Through |
| What's Holding You Back? 8 Critical | | | | trainings, business support groups and |
| Choices For Women's Success.) But this | | | | private work, she teaches women how to |
| means we must leverage our ability to | | | | make peace with money and create more |
| take risks even more, because we are | | | | profitable practices. 206.634. |